Search results for: "Hatred"
- Infinity… Love leading to hatred: Someone mistreats someone you love, so you’re really going to hate that person. Hatred leading to love: If somebody mistreats someone you dislike, you’re going to like the person who mistreated the object of your hatred. Then hatred leading to hatred: You hate somebody, somebody treats them well, so you hate that second person. It’s all very …
- Self-Hatred… How can you look at your mistakes without getting all tangled up in self-hatred, self-frustration? This is where the right attitudes come in. Look at those instructions the Buddha gave to Rahula. He said that when you see an action that you’ve done has caused harm, you should feel shame and loathing—not shame and loathing for yourself, shame and loathing …
- The Ennobling Path… There was even that Buddhist teacher who said, “This principle that hatred is never appeased by hatred, that it’s only appeased by non- hatred, i.e. goodwill,” was totally useless. Didn’t have any practical application when things were so uncertain. Actually, though, that principle was designed for times when people really are seething with hatred, when they have to be reminded that …
- In the Mood… The Dalai Lama once said the thing he found most surprising about Westerners was their self-hatred. In Tibet, he said, only the village idiots feel self-hatred. Of course, he said that smiling, but it’s a pretty harsh judgment. And it’s also true, I noticed, in Thailand. Perhaps not so much any more: As modern culture moves in, it really does …
- Emotion… again, hatred for your body—why do you hate it? The body’s sitting there, it’s not doing anything. Or hatred for yourself, for being a bad person: That’s not totally true. You’ve got your good side as well. It’s not that your bad side is more real than your good side. Learn how to be able to label things …
- How to Use the Teaching on Kamma… It simply means you don’t develop hatred for that person. If you have hatred for that person, it’s going to be hard to figure out the right thing to do. You try to get the hatred out of the way, you get the anger out of the way, so that you can see clearly what needs to be done. Part of the …
- Training the Whole Mind… Your hatred turns into a hatred of the defilements. You learn how to use the energy of these things for your own true benefit. That’s when you can be said to be a discerning meditator. You can’t gain insight simply by following the rules. Somebody says, “For insight you need to do one, two, three, four, five, six, and seven. So you …
- Before Your Face Was Born… either exaggerated self-esteem or exaggerated self-hatred, back and forth, back and forth. And either extreme can make you miserable because the idea of self, of who you are, becomes the big issue in life. You have to do everything you can to shore it up. Then when you find yourself doing things that are not up to that high standard, you feel …
- Metta Can Hurt… As he points out, there’s love that’s the result of love, and there’s also hatred that’s the result of love. In other words, you love someone and someone else comes and harms that person; it’s hard not to hate the second person. There’s also love that comes from hatred. If you don’t like x and someone else …
- The Conditions for Goodwill… It’s not innate to the mind, any more innate than hatred can be. Hatred can be very easy to feel. Anger can be very easy to feel. Greed, aversion, jealousy: All of these things are just as natural as the good side of the mind. And the mind is something that can change very quickly. There are passages where the Buddha asks the …
- Attachment vs. Affection… He talks about the hatred that comes from affection, and the affection that comes from hatred. In other words, if there’s somebody you love, and somebody else has been nasty to that person, you’re going to hate the person who’s been nasty to the person you love. Or if there’s somebody you really hate, and somebody else hates that person …
- Brahmaviharas on the Path… There’s hatred, he says, that can come from love. In other words, if you love someone, and someone else is going to do something harmful to them, you’re going to hate that person. There’s also love that comes from hatred: If you have a mutual enemy, you become friends. So in the Buddha’s eyes, love is not an attitude that …
- At Home with the Breath… have that other habit.” But because you’re learning this new habit in the mind, you’re in a better position to let go of that bad habit—not out of hatred or aversion, but simply because you realize it doesn’t serve any purpose. The sense of well-being you can develop with the breath—by working, adjusting, and then maintaining whatever good …
- Crossing the River… And it’s amazing the amount of hatred that they’ve focus on the ego. But that’s not the way the Buddha taught. When he teaches the not-self, he isn’t saying he’s going to deprive you of anything. He’s simply pointing out that there are other ways of finding happiness than creating this sense of self. And there are …
- The Purity of Your Intentions… Either the things they like—in other words, a piece of news that fits in with something they’ve already believed—or their hatreds: Something fits in with some resentments they’ve been carrying all along. Or delusion. Or fear. That’s it: likes, dislikes, delusions, fear. These four things lead people to do all kinds of horrible things. So when information is hard …
- How to Be Self-Centered… When the time comes to let go of that self, you’re not letting go out of hatred or neurotic fear. You let go simply because you realize you don’t need it anymore. Think of the image of the raft. You get to the other side of the river and put the raft aside, but you still have appreciation for the raft. “This …
- Self Determination… The whole society is designed around taking advantage of the defilements of greed, hatred, and fear: Other people have their defilements; you have your defilements. And as long as you stay in there, everybody in the society seems to be okay—at least that’s their attitude. But you look at yourself: Is this really what you want out of life? Just birth, aging …
- GuardedThere’s a passage where the Buddha recommends a way of thinking to help overcome your hatred of another person. It starts out, “This person has wronged me, but what should I expect? This person has wronged people I love, but what should I expect? This person has done good things for people I hate, but what should I expect?” And he has you …
- Me, Me, Me… stress? Where is the suffering?” When you take things apart in this way, then the job becomes a lot more manageable, and you can do it without a lot of self-hatred. Sometimes you see people who really hate themselves, loving the idea that there is no self, thinking they can just do away with any sense of self and not have to deal …
- Above the World… liking, hatred, delusion, or fear. Only when you can get the mind away from that spinning around can you keep it from tilting in those directions. It won’t get blown over no matter which direction the wind is coming from. That’s a mind you can trust—and a mind that other people can trust as well. So this is the purpose of …
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